Today is a great day.
I used to measure the greatness of a day by how the day went overall. If it started out great, ended great and everything in between was great, then it was a GREAT day. In fact, apparently I had so many of them that, if a day was not smooth and enjoyable from start to finish, than it was a crummy day, or a sub-par day, at best.
Recently, I have started to wonder how many people judge the greatness of their day by the same criteria I did once. If the day went untroubled, with no issues at work, no strife at home and if I was able to do something I really enjoyed like a manicure or dinner out, then that was a great day. You know, those days that are just so effortless, you feel like you are weightless and on cruise control. But, if something unexpected came up at work, if my husband and I got into a disagreement or even if I hit more traffic than usual, then my day became less than great - it became frustrating, aggravating, sometimes even a day worth forgetting.
Smith-Magenis Syndrome is shifting that need to judge a day by the amount of hiccups that arise. Smith-Magenis Syndrome makes it almost impossible to have a GREAT day based on my previous criteria - there are far too many daily unexpected challenges now. If I were to assess each day based on the amount of difficult moments there are versus the amount of pleasant moments, every day would score as a pretty bad day.
I am learning at the school of life that I have a choice to make about how I perceive my day. Earlier this week, Sienna was in the middle of a terrible tantrum and as I reached down to pick her up and tried to console her, she jabbed her finger up my nose and blood came pouring out.
But, when she was done with her tantrum, she gave me a hug and told me that I am her friend....a line she has been using a lot lately and I smile every time I hear it.
Towards the middle of the week, I took both of the kids to the pool for an end of the summer swim. When it was time to leave, she threw herself on the floor, bit her wrists and smacked her head all while screaming and yelling that she was not going to leave the pool. I picked her up and carried her out - she tried to hit me the entire way to the car.
But, just before that tantrum, she and her brother, Sean, were splashing together in the pool, chasing each other and playing like typical siblings. It brought me so much joy to see them interact so lovingly.
And, just today, about 30 minutes ago, Sienna lost her control, stripped off all of her clothes, and started throwing everything off of the shelves in an explosive and dramatic meltdown because it was time to end a fun activity.
But, the activity that she didn't want to end was an afternoon living room dance session - Sienna and I danced on the coffee table and sofas to an old Sesame Street music video. We were laughing, giggling and spinning each other around. It was a blast.
I write this because I want to be held accountable to all of it. I never want to be convicted of allowing my circumstances to steal my joy. I never want the regret of permitting the dark moments to overshadow the beautiful ones, the losses to eclipse the victories. I am far too blessed to concede to that.
Yes, Smith-Magenis Syndrome is heart-breaking. But, if I am not intentional about how I choose to see my day, every day, it will completely devalue everything that is good in my life. I read somewhere that life is a series of moments. I will add that, if you look closely, you will always find at least one moment in every day that is worthy of celebration. One moment or one truth that will reveal to you that today IS a GREAT day.
A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Proverbs 17:22
